Have you ever changed someone’s life in a moment?
Yes, and this is the most rewarding feeling a human being can ever experience.
Ive started several businesses over the years, my oldest business has been running for over 20 years now.
This is a business I started while in College.
Honestly, what makes me most proud of my business is the lives changed because of the work I can provide to people.
I´m proud to say that my employees find a good, safe, rewarding job in my business.
If they are willing, honest, loyal and hungry to learn we will do our best to change their lives.
My oldest employee has been working with me for over 18 years now.
She is fantastic!
When she got to my business asking for a job, she had very limited education, she was very young and in much need for a job.
She started at the very bottom, helping with cleaning.
I slowly offered her more and more responsibilities and her loyalty to the business grew even more.
I offered her more education, she attended school, she learned computing and management.
Today, she is the proud mother of 2 kids and the assistant manager of the business.
She is in charge of banking and accounting.
She is boss of over 30 employees and I trust her blindly.
That´s just one of the examples of my biggest satisfaction of being an entrepreneur.
We have the opportunity to change lives… the day we hire them!
I hope so.
There are these bracelets called Lokai.
They represent the highs & lows of life with a black bead on one end and a white bead on the other end.
Connecting them are clear silicone beads.
There is Mud from the Dead Sea encased in the black bead & Water from Mt Everest encased in the white bead.
The saying goes: When you've hit a low, stay Hopeful.
When you're on top of the world, Stay Humble.
The silicone beads represent the journey of life.
I wore the Lokai as a general reminder to stay positive no matter what happens & not to let my head get too big when I was "on top of the world".
When things would get really hard for me in particular and those 2 didn't work, I reminded myself that it's all part of a journey & even my worst days are only 24 hours.
So it means a great deal to me.
I'm a whopping 22 years old (so old, I know) and the last 6 months of 2015 were the battle of a lifetime.
The seas were rough and there was too much water in my boat; enough for me to actually consider drowning instead of fight the seemingly endless bouts of mavericks that continued to rain down on me.
I wasn't actually at sea, I'm just better at analogies than I am at explaining things, I hope it translates well.
Anyway, fast forward: I was admitted to my first & only mental hospital.
Which, by the way: If you ever foresee yourself being admitted to a mental institution, PLEASE, DO NOT watch Asylum on American Horror Story.
Especially if you've never been to one before.
Anyway, I was admitted to Laurel Ridge Treatment Center to help me with my new mental illness.
There were other people living there with me throughout the 30 day stay and people often came and left.
Regardless, we all became a family.
Although, there was someone in particular I connected with.
He is older than I & though we have the same illness, He got it in a much different way than I had.
We were reminded constantly that the mental Illness is the same regardless of how we obtained it but I believe in my heart that He has experienced more hardship than I could even fathom.
Despite everything, he is a wonderful human being and I hope he is doing well today.
He made a profound impact on me and was an immense help during my treatment.
I know it seems I'm writing a novel here, but trust me, I'm getting to the point.
One day in particular I noticed he was having a rough time.
He explained it was the anniversary of his event & I felt deep sorrow for him.
I have kept the Lokai bracelet with me while I was in Laurel Ridge too, as the same reminder it's always been to me that has helped me through rough times too.
He was immersed in an assignment & I knew I shouldn't have interrupted him but I needed to:
Can I tell you a story?
Him: Sure, go for it.
Me: * Takes it off my wrist & proceeds to show him the Lokai bracelet and tells the story of it & how it helps me*
Him: [I forgot what he said but it was something comforting]
Me: *Proceeds to give him the bracelet*.
I think it will help you more than I need it to help me.
Please keep it & remember that when you've hit a low to stay hopeful & when you're on top of the world to stay humble.
Him: *hugs me* Thank you so much, I will wear it.
We can switch with it whenever one of us is having a harder day than the other person.
Me: you're welcome and that sounds great (:
So, throughout my stay there, we'd switch with the bracelet whenever we thought the other person was having a rough day.
Every day that he had it, he wore it the whole time and I was elated to see that.
At the end of the treatment, I gave it to him to keep and he told me he'd always wear it.
I really hope it did help him & mean as much as it did to me because I believe that it did help him.
I hope he still wears it to this day and it has been a constant reminder that when you float too high, remember why you were on the ground and when you're sinking in the ocean, remember that choosing to stay alive is worth everything that may bruise you in your journey.
I understand that this was a bit lengthy, but I couldn't pass up telling this story.
I feel like I made a real difference that day.
Thank you for asking that question & thank you for your time.
Yes I have, and amazingly it was all through Quora.
It was a pretty boring day for me.
I had gone to do physiotherapy, various appointments, but nothing exciting.
This was during the summer so I did not have school or any homework to do.
It ended up being an evening on my phone, and reading Quora.
That night I was scrolling through my camera roll, looking at pictures.
Two of these pictures picked up my day, and made me a bit happier.
I went on Quora to have this questions pop up, “What made you smile today”.
I ended up writing this answer:
At the time I was also chatting on the TEA ( ) Discord chat.
I shared my answer, partly because I share every single answer in need of ego-boosting attention, but also because of the vast number of incredible writers on the chat who I want feedback from.
I got the best feedback ever from that answer.
I got a notification, only to open up Discord to this message:
This absolutely made my day, but somehow this answer made him do something he could have never imagine doing before.
So I went back on Quora, only to be met by this answer from :
Then this answer:
My answer hit hard with Simon.
Something in my answer made Simon break up with his girlfriend, at the time, and go ask out his long time crush, who we have always known as Zoe on Quora.
Now it has been revealed that Zoe is .
I am glad they are finally together.
I think that the majority of Quorans had their fingers crossed for both of you.
The feeling that you have helped change anyone’s life for the better is amazing.
The feeling of changing the life of someone you look up to is indescribable.
Simon you are incredible.
Sophie, I have only talked to you briefly, but I have the outmost confidence that you are brilliant.
I wish you both the best, and am glad I have hopefully changed both your lives in a great way.
There could be many, but two Instances in my Life, I personally felt that I have done the right thing which changed them.
While I joined the services, I wanted to hand-over and close my relationship in the trading as I was an entrepreneur.
It was the last day in office, the new Global President was the former Senior Project Manager of our firm.
I wrote a piece of advise for being visioned and being matured.
He was delighted on seeing that the next day, and called me.
Years went by.
I visited that office after 6 years, OMG! I was literally shocked on seeing their developments and net worth.
I saw my letter hanging in the walls and his PS said that my letter is in all the President’s Chamber of all countries.
He is a successful Business Man, Father and Husband today.
The transformation was incredible.
Few months ago, there was a request for something which shouldn’t be done.
I inquired the background of the person requesting and found that he was legally prosecuted and involved in few open cases.
I initially refused to do it, but he pleaded along with his fiance infront of me.
With partial tolerance and emotional background, I approved it.
After few months, I went to a fast food shop at around 10 PM to buy a parcel food as my mom was not at home.
I paid the guy and he refused to accept it.
I forced him to get the money as it was Rs.
80 (USD 1.
He then said that he was the guy whom I approved before 14 months.
He has left all the illegal works and started a small fast food shop with daily gross revenue of Rs.
He invited me to his home, which was the top of the fast food shop.
He had a kid(baby boy), and he had named him with same name as mine.
The transformation was incredible.
These things could be small in life, but when open the book of memories, it is awesome.
Neither you nor I am John Keats & Shakespeare! So avoid criticism on the Language usage, if you read my answer and understood, upvote it, else thanks and sorry that you had to spend time in reading this answer.
I was at a libertarian conference hosted by Lew Rockwell.
I was a cheeky young multi millionaire at the time and a bit arrogant.
I asked the panel of libertarians a hard question that I knew they might have trouble with, since not all of them were super rich like me.
See, my wealth made me arrogant.
I asked, “Since Libertarian political views teach that in a more libertarian world, the economy would be far better off, and thus, people in general would be far richer, it stands to reason that knowledge of Libertarian principles would more surely enable those who know about them to become rich, and it further stands to reason that we who know about libertarian ideas ought to be rich as good examples, so can you explain how you personally used libertarian ideas and values to become rich?” Well, one man on the panel had an interesting answer.
He replied, “Well, I actually left my lucrative practice of medicine delivering babies to pursue a career in politics, precisely because I wanted to expose and promote libertarian values to more people, thinking this would be more important than growing rich.
” So, in thinking about this, I then asked him a follow up question after the panel discussion.
I asked, “When are you going to run for President?” He replied, “I don’t really think I can win, it seems the nation is not yet ready for a libertarian President.
” I replied, “Didn’t you get into politics to reach more people with the Libertarian message? If you ran for president, you would certainly reach far more people with the message.
And in that sense, you can’t lose.
” A month later he ran for president for the first time.
That man’s name was Ron Paul.
Early in my career with ride share, I was on wait time at a pickup one evening on the Southeast side of Greenville.
I was driving my other ride share vehicle which is a BMW 328i.
I normally drive UberSelect; but, was trying to pick up some extra rides taking UberX calls.
This was a part of the city I don’t frequent often on my uptown/downtown/airport routes.
I had just arrived at the pin and it was not looking good.
The housing was tenement style, four room apartments with a chair or bench on the front porch.
A slender Black girl in a KFC uniform waved out a screen door of apartment 3D and shouted “I’m coming.
Three doors down a boy and two little girls came outside to play beside my car.
The young boy had to be about eight or nine and the girls five or six years old.
The boy was unceremoniously dragging a small puppy behind him.
He had his thumb in the puppy’s eye socket and with the rest of his fingers had it by the ears dragging the poor animal down the stairs.
The poor puppy look dazed and scrawny.
With an enormous potbelly it appeared to have worms.
The boy squatted on the side walk with his foot across the puppy’s throat and began hitting the puppy’s underbelly with a stick.
The little girls squealed with laughter and clapped their hands.
With the gleeful attention, the little boy went one step further and began shoving the stick up the puppy’s rectum.
The puppy squalled and I had seen enough.
I leaned on my horn to get their attention, made eye contact, shook my head and mouthed the word “no”.
The boy leered back defiantly at me; but, removed the stick from the puppy’s behind.
I turned my attention to texting the rider to hurry up.
When I looked back over at the children, I was shocked at what I saw.
The boy had gotten a can of spray paint and with a lighter in one hand was spraying the puppy with what amounted to a blow torch.
Clearly the paint had an oil base and was highly flammable.
He liberally sprayed the burning paint all over the underside of the puppy.
The paint stuck to the burned hair and flesh and continued to burn even after the lighter went out.
The puppy was screaming and crying in pain.
The little girls just thought this was the most wonderful entertainment they had ever seen.
I have a soft spot for animals and I was about to blow a gasket.
I jumped out and rounded the front of the car ready to slap that kid silly.
Realizing I was in a neighborhood that would not sympathize with a stranger smacking one of their kids around, my better sense got a hold of me and I walked over, pushed the kid aside and grabbed up the puppy.
I bundled it into me to put out the flames and gently carried it around to the driver’s seat.
My rider had still not appeared.
Slipping the car into gear with my left hand and driving with my knee, I cradled the puppy while I called the rider and told them I was canceling.
I took off for the closest animal urgent care I could think of and arrived in record time.
The little puppy was still whimpering in pain, so I quickly handed it off to the vet tech to hopefully get it some pain meds as soon as possible.
After about an hour the vet came out and told me the puppy was sleeping comfortably on some pain meds; but, that they were going to keep her a few days so the burns could get scabbed up and would not get infected.
I asked if she was otherwise okay.
He said other than being malnourished and a little wormy, she would survive the burns.
Five days later I went to pick up the puppy.
She cowered at the back of the cage, head down, eyes sad and clearly in need of some TLC.
I sat down by the cage and just sat there, letting it get comfortable with me.
After a while, I slipped my hand in the cage and gently stroked her head and spoke softly to the little thing.
I was rewarded with a lick and an ever so slight wag of its tail.
I wanted to pick her up and hug her; but, the vet tech said the burns were still sensitive and brought out a basket to put her in.
She went home with me that night.
Over the weeks and months that followed, Lady recovered from the burns and maltreatment.
She grew into a 100 pound Shar-pei Labrador mix.
She was incredibly gentle with children, mothered baby chicks and goslings; but, could scare the pants off someone with a bark and vicious looking growl.
She was my baby, my child.
We went everywhere together.
One day, she was with me as I fought early morning traffic going through Williamston.
I had an episode and passed out.
When I woke up, I was in the hospital.
I had a head on collision with another car and had broken a hip, left leg, five ribs, cracked my shoulder blade, suffered a concussion and knocked half my teeth out.
When my girlfriend came in, I asked her about my dog.
With sorrow in her eyes she explained that due to internal injuries from the accident, that Lady
had not made it.
RIP my Lady.
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Care and share.
Yes, for bad and for good.
I wanna start from the bad.
Back then during my high school days when I was into drugs and pills.
There was a friend of a friend that was constantly blaming everyone including God anytime anything goes wrong.
Any time I was with him he would always complain and place blame on any one around.
He even blamed his parent for his poor performance in school, he said that when he was in his mother's womb that his father told him that they were extremely poor, so he concluded that his mother didn't eat healthy and that is what affected his brain.
He was really naive about life.
No amount of motivational speech changed him then.
One day I told him that I can give him something that will make him forget about all his misfortunes and that he would go to space without rockect.
Then I was also naive, I just wanted to help and I thought introducing him to escapism might work.
He was eager like a man waiting for the delivery of his wife, So I introduced him to drugs and pills and he was happy and he blessed the day he met me.
Fast forward to last month.
I went to visit a friend, the friend that introduced me to him, we were having good time until the dude I taught how to go to space without rocket came in, he was looking like hell, even a blind man can tell he is an addict, kudos to me.
Immediately I was drowned in the ocean of guilts.
He said he heard I was around so he came to say hello and that he was broke that he needed some money to buy some pills and drugs.
As he left my other friend told me that his family has tried every possible mean to help him but all was in vain and he wouldn't wanna go to rehab.
I also have been trying to help him.
Now for good
Couple of years back I met a high school dude in a bus, he didn't have money to pay for the transport so the driver told him he should not bother, obviously the driver has a son like him.
The dude sat next to me, I was irritated because the dude didn't even say a “thank you” like the bus was for free.
So I introduced myself to him and told him that if I was the driver I would regret helping him and he asked why in a surprised tone and I said because he wasn't grateful.
I told him numerous benefits of gratitude, He was listening reluctantly but I'm quite certain that he got the message.
Fast forward to last week, I Went to a random restaurant to have lunch,I called the waiter and I saw that same dude, he was the waiter and he recognized me instantly.
After the meal he said I shouldn’t bother to pay I was surprised, he told me that what I taught him made a profound effect in his life and not just his life and his father’s life.
I was flattered but still couldn't comprend How that got to do with his father, So he went on saying that the restaurant belongs to his father and that they have a lot of customers despite the competition in that area and he said the secret is not just the delicious food but the gratitude.
He explained how he took time to send every customer a gratitude text whereby leaving the customers no choice but to keep on patronizing them.
Imagine a kind of girl who is totally dependant on everyone for everything, be it any house work, studies, notes, outings, traveling etc
i live in Mumbai and work in one of the known MNC, my impression on my friends is like if i talk something, they know it makes sense and is relevant upto some extent.
This girl was my super junior in graduation, i never talked to her much, we were just in same building
years later i saw her on FB, she had recently completed her graduation and was same as before.
Totally dependent, no will power to find job on her own, no excitement to travel or socially connect with strangers.
we once had some chit chat asking each others about future plans and career.
i found her dumber than before and wanted to block her for she had no knowledge, no interesting topics to chat on and was tedious that made me loose my nerves and i then planned to bring her out of the isloation she was living in.
we later connected on call and i suggested her to come to mumbai to find some decent job and i promised her that i will be there to look after her.
She convinced her dad and dropped by mumbai with him.
first day i managed to meet her and help her in accomodation and consoled her dad that i will look after her no matter what.
Her dad left in peace thinking i will take her care properly.
since next day i stopped talking to her, meeting her, helping her in any ways as if i wasn’t there.
i didn’t even pick a single call from her, i left her in shock, she might have been all set to kill me the moment i go before her.
after almost 8 months, i called her to ask if shes fine and there she was “INDEPENDENT” “MATURE” “EMPLOYED” “RESPECTFUL” “TALKATIVE”
I understand what i did has kept someone on big risk but that what has now been a reason of her success and thats why i feel happy for her.
So i think i contributed a little bit to change her life ina better way.
I was at the busy N/W corner of Powell & Geary St in San Francisco/ on Powell St.
The taxi cabs line up in front of the St Francis Hotel to my immediate left and that corner is always mayhem to cross towards Union Square.
I was standing at the corner (red light) waiting for the signal to change.
A young girl had her headphones on and was looking down at her phone as she quickly brushed my shoulder and walked past me stepping off the curb and right into the street.
(This next part happen so quickly it is impossible to comprehend the speed of my body's reaction and the strength)
A taxi cab was pulling away from the Powell St curb just as a big SUV had punching it to swerve around the taxi cab and turn the corner onto Geary St heading north.
The girl looking down with the headphones on was brushing my shoulder passing me standing still and she was stepping right out into the street in front of these two cars and the speeding SUV heading towards her.
I lifted up a bit and my left arm reached out, grabbing the back of her coat between her shoulder blades and yanked her from the street below back up onto the curb sidewalk and into me just as the SUV clipped the edge of the concrete curb, so close the side mirror made a puff of wind as it passed across my right shoulder.
(I am right handed and have no strength to lift someone with my left wrist/arm.
The movement was so split second and the force so intense and I felt complete silence and numb while it was all happening.
I am not some lunatic crazy lady.
I believe in science 100%.
But I swear there was some force working through me that yanked that girl back from the street and back onto the sidewalk.
I am 5′ tall.
The 20 something girl was much talker and the yank was such a split second movement and with a force that was beyond my capabilities.
I lifted her up with my hand clasped on the back of her coat between her shoulder blades.
We never even said a word to one another.
The light changed and I just walk forward to cross and she stayed standing on the curb.
And everything was so silent like I was deaf and the numbness it was so incredibly odd.
Like an out of body disconnection.
It was so silent and I felt amazing quiet calm.
Well, not in one moment but yes in small moments daily.
There is an old homeless lady near my home.
So old that she finds it really difficult to walk.
I can tell that she is lonely as she spends all morning in a dumpsters picking up knick-knacks and collects it in a dump bag she slowly carries it along with her.
I can also tell she has a poor eye sight owing to her age.
Her saaree is torn and her blouse all patchy with a rickety glasses.
Every morning when on my way to work, I saw her and she called to anyone asking for money or food or just time.
I always felt bad for her.
I generally am a cynic to consider such things as an “act” but there was something in me that made me reach out to her.
I started out by giving her some money everyday.
10 bucks, mostly.
I once saw her asking for a bun at a bakery.
The bakery guy asked her to pay 5 bucks for it as “it doesn’t come for free” but he would give her a glass of tea free.
Since then, I started giving her something to eat every morning.
I guess she is just hungry.
Soft ripened Banana, or a cream bun.
I sometimes packed two idilies (steamed rice cakes) from my home in a wrapper and gave it to her.
I ensured I give her something softer to munch on she didn’t have much of her teeth left.
I moved to Mysore for 6 months for my new job.
Unfortunately, I should have replaced someone instead of me to give her something in the morning for her breakfast.
I guess she generally used to wait at the end of my street for me.
She always used to small talk with me in Tamil, but I couldn’t understand anything as her pronunciations were incomprehensible due to her lack of teeth.
So, for almost 6 months she didn’t really know what happened to me.
She used to ask nearby shops as to what happened to ‘that girl who carried a blue backpack.
’ I doubt if she knew where I stayed.
Fast forward a few months, when I came home for a few days of holiday, I wondered what happened to that old lady…and when I just went for a walk one morning I saw her at the same bakery again requesting for a tea.
I felt so very very bad for forgetting her and moving on.
I bought her her tea and bun that day for breakfast.
She was so happy to see me and kept asking me something I couldn’t comprehend.
Ever since then, in my absence, I calculated and paid the bakery guy about 500 bucks every month to give her whatever she asks for.
He told me “Not to encourage stuff like that”.
I told him to “shut up and do as you are told.
In my absence, I at least ensure she gets to eat in the morning, everyday.
One hunger at a time.
One punch at a time.
One stand at a time.
I have and that was the worst moment in my life.
I was in a distance relationship.
We loved each other so deeply.
He is from a very rich family and parents focused on business and money.
I'm not a rich girl and we were not from the same caste too.
His parents couldn't accept us for this reason and he told me he is breaking up with me.
I was so broken.
But within 2 days,he called me and said he cannot forget me.
He requested me to be his friend.
I couldn't say anything and reject him.
But I couldn't talk to him like earlier.
His parents were again threatening him emotionally.
For him, it was first time someone loves him so deeply.
His parents were always busy with business and he has witnessed his mom cheating his father infront of his eyes when he was a baby.
So, he didn't keep a close relationship with his mother and he was completely addicted to our relationship.
But his parents couldn't accept us and once his father played a suicide drama and he began to fall in depression.
I was already depressed and we talked but we didn't know how to console eachother.
One day, he told me not to wait for him anymore.
He told me he would meet me in next life.
He told my husband would be lucky.
I couldn't guess what he was intending, because he had already promised to meet me after one month on my birthday.
He had booked flight tickets for that.
So, I didn't think he would do anything like this.
I just thought he is talking about break up as he do all these days.
I tried to contact him after this,but I didn't get any reply.
After few days I got a call from his family and got to know he is missing.
Again after 2 days,his friends called me and said he is no more.
I curse myself for loving him and for being a reason for his death.
I tried to go with him,but my mom was begging me not to give her the same pain.
I really don't find a meaning in this cursed life after he left just for me.
It's just me changed his life and took his life in this young age and it's he changed my life that I cannot call it a life anymore.
My mom already lost a son in her life, and seeing her helpless I cannot do anything.
I realise the pain.
I'm really helpless and trying to distract myself from these thoughts.
The guilty feeling will always haunt me because my love became the reason for his death but I'm still alive.
Cathy Malmon is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker (LICSW) and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) with over 30 years of experience as a clinician.
She is co-owner of Calli Institute, , as well as a board-approved supervisor with the Board of Marriage and Family Therapy and the Minnesota Board of Behavioral Health and Therapy.
She is a specially trained EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapist.
It was as an EMDR specialist that she achieved an incredible result … she changed my life in a moment.
I had suffered two brain aneurysms resulting in a stroke that severely damaged my brain.
I suffered for years of depression, anxiety and existential crisis.
In a hopeless and desperate state, I decided to try EMDR as a way to rewire my brain.
After about a year and a half without results, in one moment everything changed.
In an instant, I “awoke” from my stroke with new emotions and new feelings—despair was replaced with feelings of peace, contentment, joy, happiness, empathy and compassion.
In an instant, I was changed into a new human beings, with emotions I didn’t even experience before my stroke.
There has not been one day since the eventful day of my brain “rewiring” that I haven’t experienced these continual emotions and feelings of happiness.
For years, I felt like life cheated me; now I feel like I am cheating … I do not experience the ups and downs of ordinary human existence.
My joy is permanent (going on a year now of constant peace of mind and happiness in my heart).
One morning, around 3am, a group of us were on the Flyaway to LAX.
Shortly after 9/11.
A short ride.
But something significantly huge happened.
I'm not usually the type that strikes up conversations with strangers, especially at that hour.
But it was eerily quiet.
There was this man sitting directly in front of me and a woman to his left, almost asleep.
We were all solo.
I decided to break the silence and start a conversation.
I mentioned that last time I flew, I had a brand new bottle of my favorite perfume that I had in my carry on, but had to toss it because of the new regulations and I was upset.
I said something about 9/11 and all the new regulations.
The man spoke up and said “I was in the ______ tower (I can't remember which), and thankfully made it out alive.
So many I worked with perished that day.
” The lady to his left suddenly perks up and mentioned that she was also in the same tower and was thankful to survive.
I decided to play love connection, got them to start talking by asking questions and by the end of it, they were very flirty.
I asked them if they wanted to all exchange numbers, seeing how we all grew so close in so little time.
I said I expected a text because I want an invitation to their wedding- absolutely joking.
Turns out they were both flying back to New York.
Lived very close to each other, were both single, etc….
About 7 months later I get a text on my phone from the man!!!! They were engaged.
He wanted me to fly there for their wedding because I was the one who made it happen.
I, unfortunately, couldn't make it due to the distance and my commitments in California, but wished them the very best.
I still occasionally get a text from one or the other thanking me, usually on that day we all met.
I’d like to think I did.
I’ve been friends with him for many years.
Although he is a year older than me, we used to hang out after school and soon became good friends.
He’s always had a warm heart and everybody around liked him.
We sadly drifted apart during university, but thanks to him we got in touch again about 5 or 6 years later.
Even though we did not have much in common any more, it was fantastic seeing him again.
He had been working for a big retail company for years, bought a small flat, had a girlfriend, everything seemed to be going well for him.
However I soon learnt that he wasn’t really in a good place.
He was stuck in a job that didn’t like, surrounded by a toxic group of people, and without a chance to grow at all.
Things were so bad indeed, that he was getting sick out of the stress caused by the situation, and he couldn’t see a way out as he didn’t have any degree or particular skill that he could use to get a better job.
He used to invite me to his place for supper and after a few times there I realised something interesting: he had become an amazing chef.
Even with all he had going on, every time I arrived to his place I could see he had the TV on with a cooking show, he was always cooking more and more impressive dishes.
He was passionate about it! It was his way out, but he just couldn’t see it.
So I “helped him”.
Me: Dude why don’t you become a chef?…
Friend: wait, what?
Me: There’s this school you can go to, and study there for two years to become a real chef and and they have work placement programmes, so there’s no way you won’t get a job after you finish.
You got some passion and talent right here!
He started thinking more and more about that school, found out more about them, and after a while of planning and against all odds, he made it work.
He was completely broke for two years, his family thought he was making a huge mistake, he went through some dark moments but he made it.
He became a chef.
He finished school and landed a job where he was working probably even twice the time he used to, in a very stressful environment too, not very well paid, the whole thing was crazy.
But guess what.
He was happy.
And years later he still is.
He found something that he loves and he was able to make a living out of it.
I don’t know many people who can say the same.
And I feel I didn’t really do much for him, besides being there when he needed it.
But he’s been grateful for that conversation and that moment of clarity for years.
And I can’t be happier for him.
I think more than I have changed, they got changed through me.
I don't want to portray myself as being powerful enough to change somebody's life as clearly I AM NOT but just to share an interesting story, I am writing this.
So, there was a guy let's say X and there was a girl let's say Y and both were happily in relationship with each other and I happen to be extremely close to X as we were together from long time and also with Y as she was working with on some initiative (pardon me for missing details, you all know why I am hiding them) and I was happy for both of them as I always thought they complement each other very well.
And suddenly one day I was working on that initiative and the girl Y comes and says that she wants to break up with X and I was shell shocked as everything was going very well and X was one hell of a guy, he was superb ( He is still alive, just writing WAS for narration).
So, I told her that you go and tell him on face that this is what you want and end it if that is your final decision (After a lot of convincing).
She said that she alone cannot do it and I should also accompany her for this purpose.
Now, I was in DHRAMASANKAT meaning big trouble as I knew the guy is emotional but somehow I went as I thought that may help him eventually.
We went and she said whatever she wanted to say, he felt helpless and soap opera follows and all that but somehow within next 2-3 days both knew that it was over.
Durind this period, the only thing I did was to keep my mind away from judgements as I know matters regarding relationships are complex, So there must not be any pin pointing and my position between the two was also vulnerable but the main task with me was to somehow uplift my friend X as he needed that badly as I was observing him after the incident.
So, I went to his room and obviously he looked sad and told him that he needs to keep himself as busy as possible for next few months come what may.
He agreed but asked how?
So, the intiative I was working on, I made him lead it and told him that I will just be directing him wherever he felt necessary and all the intellectual as well as calculative part will be handled by him and also I handed over my team to him and he was a likable person so everybody accepted him as a leader and he started working and working and to my surprise more working.
Within 15 days or so, I can see a spark on his face, he was again normal and was enthusiastic regarding the initiative.
But there was another small problem as the girl Y was also working on the same initiative so I made sure that she was given the department where there is no direct need of communication between X and Y and it worked and even if they need to communicate, they can but through me.
Obviously there was some discomfort when they saw each other but that was fine as both were busy and were doing something constructive in life.
This small initiative from my side helped the guy survive the tough times and also the girl to sail through and find more meaning.
It always felt great when I saw X working (Y also but more X, may be bromance).
Disclaimer-: There were times also when I wanted to help people in some way and I tried but they didn't received it even when they wanted it badly.
By this, I want to say that things happen by themselves and we just keep becoming medium for them to take fruit and to the luck of three of us involved, It worked and then there are times when I find myself helpless and hopeless.
So, to say this that I can change somebody's is life is a wrong statement, It just happened through me which I think is a more intelligent statement.
I AM SORRY AS I READ “IN A MOMENT” IN THE QUESTION AFTER WRITING THIS WHOLE STUFF AS CLEARLY IT TOOK TIME BUT I DID NOT FELT LIKE DELETING IT NOW.
Long time ago, I was walking alone near a railway station.
Then I saw a girl(20) who acted unethical way and standing on the rail path.
In the mean time, a train were coming from the another side.
I got the fact that she had tried to suicide.
Then I ran fast towards her as much as I can.
Thanks God, I was able to save her.
I asked her why did he run for suicide?
She told that, she had a strong and intimacy relationship with a boy(24).
It was 3 years long relationship.
The girl loved him a lot.
They maintained physical relations with each other for many times.
The girl lost her hope falling deeply in love on him but the boy betrayed her.
He just kept her for fulfilling his sexual demand.
The girl is so nice and pretty well.
I was able to making her understand about the value of life.
And then she had become my best friend.
After 1 years of friendship relation, we were getting understood that we were just fall in love with each other.
Now she is my girl friend.
I love her a lot.
Still I can’t imagine any single moment without her.
She learns that living peacefully is the best gift of God ever and love is made us colorful.
It was a normal busy day in Delhi.
As far I remember it was Dec, 2014.
I was in rush to go to site.
I missed my office cab.
Hence I opted for an auto which was supposed to drop me till nearest metro station.
I took the auto.
Suddenly I felt something is wrong with the driver.
He was shivering.
I asked him to stop the auto and enquired about the problem.
He got down and showed me his left feet which was badly injured and it was bleeding.
When I asked him what happened to him, he explained someone drove a car above it.
I felt very sad about it and asked him , “Aap kyun auto chala rahe ho aj phir?” ( why are you driving auto then?)
In reply “Beti, Malik ko 600 Rs dena padhta hai roj, nahi to naukri chala jayega mera” ( I have to give 600/- to the auto owner everyday, else I will be fired )
I asked him “ How much you have earned since morning? “
Me- “Doctor dikhaya apne?” (Have you seen a doctor after this incident? )
He- “Paisa nahi hai ilaj karwane ke liye “ (I have no money to visit a doctor)
After listening this I immediately took him to doctor , he plastered his fractured leg .
Since I was very famous to fracture my ankle (half-yearly basis) , the doctor knew me quite well.
He asked me about the relation of me with the driver and I explained the entire thing.
The doctor even did not take the money from me for his treatment.
He prescribed few medicines for next 2 weeks and advised the auto driver to take rest at home.
I bought medicine and droped him to his home (actually he was driving the auto) 😀 .
But still he was worried about his job.
I assured him that I will give him 800 Rs (600 Rs to his boss and 200 Rs for his daily survival, yes this 200 rs is too less to survive, But I could not afford more than this at that time ) everyday for next 15 days.
Rest about his treatment , I will take care.
He was not comfortable at all to take this money.
I told him if you want to return this money do one thing for me – “ help someone spontaneously , when you see someone needs you and if I ever see your auto in road I will just take a free ride 😀 ”
I took care of everything until he was completely fit.
I went to see him everyday after work and gave money to his boss .
Day passed, he invited me at his house during “makar sankranti” .
That day he cried a lot infront of me and blessed me and said me “ Jo apne bete ne kabhi kiya nahi mere liye, wo apne kiya, humesha dua karenge ke aap jaha bhi rahe, humesha khush rahe “ ( My son never did such thing to me, which you did.
I will pray to god for your happiness )
“If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day — go fishing.
If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.
I got admitted into the university at 15 years old.
I thought it was the same for every one else.
It shouldn't be hard to get admitted right?
So, one night I decided to take a stroll when I met this young man selling network vouchers in a corner somewhere.
In Nigeria, you will always find young guys sitting under an umbrella in a corner somewhere selling call cards.
I walked up to him, bought a recharge card (as we refer to it) for my phone and sat beside him.
Not long after we got talking, I noticed that he had graduated from secondary school (high school) long ago with no intention of furthering his education.
I asked him why and he told me he doesn't have the funds.
I told him why it's important for him to get an education and promised to support him financially from my pocket money if he would try.
for some reasons I moved out of that neighborhood not long after.
7 years passed.
I ran into him.
He was in tears.
Telling me how he had just graduated from the higher institution.
He said my discussion with him that night changed his life.
And that he had never given a thought to furthering his education until that night.
It still humbles me to think that a guy about 5 years older than me at the time will take my advices seriously.
It always moves me to tears each time I remember him.
This was on a summer afternoon driving along on a local but rural highway with a speed limit of 50 mph.
Route 7 in Lenox, Massachusetts.
I was in a Volvo station wagon, and for some reason I opened the sunroof as I was driving along.
I almost never do this.
Less than a minute later, I came to the end of a long straight section of this road where there is a traffic light at a crossroad and the road becomes 2 lanes in each direction for a short distance.
Near the Mount
I was behind a large truck – what I think you call a box truck – kind of local delivery truck – cab in front with box body.
As the road changed to 2 lanes, I passed him on his left
I looked at him as I passed, through the now open sunroof and saw that he was focused on his phone, he was looking down at his hand Up ahead in his lane was a small import sedan, maybe a Nissan Sentra or something of that size.
It was stopped at the light.
I saw that the truck driver didn't see it so I honked and put my arm up through the open sunroof and pointed at the car.
He looked up, a look of terror crossed his face and he stomped on his brakes, his tires squealed, left strips of rubber on the road, I could hear everything in his truck slamming up against the front of the box, and he came to a stop about two feet off the back bumper of that little car.
The two older people in it didn't seem to realize they had just escaped serious injury and likely death.
The truck driver looked st me, still white as a sheet, I saw him, he saw me, I drove on.
I often think of that moment when I drive that road and how lucky I was to have opened the sunroof when I did.
I think sometimes we are put into the right place st the right time I am glad I was there.
This one will always stick in my mind and even though it happened a few years ago still tugs at the heart strings.
As a Police officer the decisions you make every day can and does change someones life.
Some for better, so for worse
At one time I worked in a specialist department investigating the sexual abuse of children.
A lot of these allegations were historic and the victims were in their early 20’s now but the abuse happened when they were children.
In one such case a man had been abusing numerous children mostly boys between the ages of 5 and 12.
All the boys attended a particular club run by the abuser.
One boy, now in his 20’s had made an allegation of abuse and given me details of other boys he thought may have been abused as well.
I visited one of the people on the list who was now married with a one year old baby and spoke to him alone.
Like all the other boys on the list he had never reported or told anyone including his wife that he had been abused.
After a long time speaking to him he broke down totally and explained what had happened to him.
At the end he said that because of the abuse he had never been able to change his own child's diaper or be left alone with her for fear someone would think he was abusing his baby.
It has caused real problems between he and his wife as he could not tell her the real reason.
He asked that I sat down with him and his wife and explain what had been going on as he felt unable to do so.
The following day I did just that.
Both just looked at each other for a few seconds then started crying and hugging each other.
She was brilliant, supportive and understanding.
The next day the victim rang me to tell me the following.
He had gone for a bath when his wife walked in with the baby.
She put the baby in the bath with him, said she had arranged to go out with her friends and stay there the night and she would see him tomorrow.
She then left before he could find any words to say.
He just sat there in the bath with his daughter and cried.
He said in that moment he knew his life and that of his baby and wife had changed.
She trusted him without reserve and was showing it.
He said it was the best night of his life.
I was lucky… as a Police Officer it is actually quiet rare to be thanked but when you see and hear something like this you know how much of a difference you can and do make.
It is one of the best feelings in the world.
I was going to my friends home as it was Sunday , I had taken sharing autorikshaw (shuttle ) , two people were already sitting inside the auto .
on the next cross road a lady waived her hand the driver stopped the auto and she got into it
From here here everything started
She was weeping and crying hard , but she had a stall(duppatta) over her face .
I was not comfertable I wanted to ask her what's the matter but as 2 other people were also present .
She got down on the second last stop I also told driver :
“Bhaiya Muje bhi idhar hi utar Kitna du?”
Approached her :
I really wanted to knw what Te matter was , I stopped her and asked what's the problem .
She :nothing it's my family matter
I : fine , I told her if it's somthing serious u can approach police or else I could help you in any way .
She : what would you help ?, I don't want money .
I : I am not saying that I will give you money , just tell me what's the problem I can tell you suggestion .
She : I am married I have small baby of 2 years , my husband is alcoholic , I need to work to earn , money to feed my baby .
It's really hard .
I just want my happy life back
I : stop crying !!!
I was not having any solution to tell , thinking I was a fool , I was just 20 and thinking of solving others life problem
She : continued crying and tried to stop her tears with her cloth but tears were just moving down .
I : I ran and bought a water bottle for her , than I told her in strong words
Its life everyone has problems , ups and down are part of life .
Think of your baby ,if you will cry she will think her mother is a loser .
I said her tell your husband when he is not drunk that think of our baby what she will feel when she gets big and others fill tease her that your fathers is alcoholic .
I said take your stand and talk to your husband , make him fall in love with you so that he don't go outside and stops having alcohol.
Things will become good .
Fight for it and you will win , you need to make life happy for your baby .
Oww what I had spoken I never had spoke like that earlier
She : yes your right , I will try my best .
Than she said thank you .
she insisted me take money for the water bottel I refused .
I don't know what change I would have made in her life ,
But I am sure she would have taken her life in new way and tried to make in best
When I was fourteen, I changed someone’s life.
The whole process took more than a moment, but there was a certain time when I felt everything has changed.
My best friend had severe depression, and I later found out anorexia nervosa.
One day, I saw her drawing in a class we had together.
When the class ended, she left her folder on accident and went home.
I picked it up and took it home with me so I could give it to her the next day.
I decided to look at it because I love her drawings, and I am admittedly rather nosy.
When I opened the folder, I instantly knew something was wrong.
The first page showed a girl with cuts all down her arm (I knew my friend self harmed, so that wasn't too much of a surprise), and surrounding her were negative phrases such as “kill yourself”, “ugly”, “they would be better without you,” etc.
There was a poem telling about how much she wishes to die.
As I continued looking in the folder, I realized just how serious this was.
I had heard before what you were supposed to do in these situations, but I felt as though I would be betraying her if I did those, so I wrote.
I wrote seven letters to her telling her I saw what she wrote and begging her not to hurt herself.
I spent hours crying and trying to find ways to tell her how loved she was.
I tried to express how empty I would feel without her.
I tried to find a way to make sure she wouldn't harm herself.
Eventually, I decided that I couldn't just give the folder back.
The next morning I prepared for school I got dressed quickly, and my mother was still getting ready when I finished.
I didn't know what to do, so I decided to put on some makeup (a rare occurrence).
When I finished, my mom was ready to go, and she complimented me and told me how beautiful I looked.
My bottom lip quivered as I looked up at my mother.
“I think one of my friends might be suicidal.
” As soon as I said that, I new that my life and my friend’s had changed forever.
My mother’s face fell, and rushed over to me.
I remember seeing that she hugged me, but I didn't really feel it.
My mom took me straight to the school.
We decided that she would go inside to help me talk to someone about what was happening.
We went into the school, and my principal saw me crying.
She asked what was wrong, and I tried to explain, but I was stuttering and crying to much for her to understand.
I remember my mom repeating what I said, and the way she said it made it feel so small.
The principal escorted us into her office and getting one of the counsellors to come too.
The principal left the room for a second to get something, and I started chuckling.
The room was covered in fake plants and garden decorations.
There was even a large toadstool as a fourth seat.
At the time, I found it deeply humorous.
When the principal came back, I did my best to explain what had happened, and the principal looked sad but not surprised.
“Some of your teachers warned us to pay attention to her,” she told me.
Then, she asked if I wanted my friend to know that I was the one who gave the office the folder.
I eventually decided that I didn't want my friend to know that I had “betrayed” her.
The principal, my mom, and the counsellor all took turns telling me that they were proud of me and I had done the right thing.
My friend disappeared for about two months.
I eventually found out that she was sent to a psychiatric hospital that helped her a lot and diagnosed her with anorexia.
It has been two years since this story, and my friend is going great she still struggles with her eating disorder, but her family is helping her with it.
She has been going to therapy, and has been working through some problems that were worsening her depression.
She later told me that she is glad that “whoever told” did because she wouldn't be around if they hadn't.
I'm sorry this was so long.
I know it doesn't answer the question precisely, but I have never written down that whole story and I needed to get it off my chest.
I hope this will fulfill the answer anyway.
Just yesterday, my friend went to her most beloved actor’s birthday evening in a stadium and the ticket was too hard to get and I was so lucky to get one the day before yesterday.
Here's the ticket.
How I GET THIS ?
I followed a girl who was talented and had a little fame and I was attracted by a new message that she had an extra ticket left, which would be given to whoever touched her first by sending a message.
I was just attempted to take a chance and texted several messages to her but she was not so interested until she had made up her mind to give it to another guy.
I was so sad and texted her I really wanted this to give my friend a surprise but It's not a big deal coz she never thought she could get one.
And the nice girl replied me that she was so sorry and If the scene would give any present she gave it to my friend.
I was thankful to this kind girl when she suddenly told me she has good news to me and asked me to leave my number and address.
And she told me I was the lucky dog who became the master of the ticket.
I got crazy at that moment and told my friend immediately, who was out of mind and in a great joy and kept saying she loves me so much.
She was lucky and cotented, me either.
And we both thanked the kind girl who gave us the chance.